Title Loans

Hey fabs,

I know the title of this blog is "Title Loans" but I can assure you, this is not about money. No, No, this blog, is all about titles and labels. People find a lot of importance in label people, places, and things. For instance, that loud girl on the train with fiery red hair and 4 kids runnin up and down the aisle smacking people upside their heads may be labeled as "ghetto". On the opposite end of the spectrum, is the black girl who talks extremely proper, with straight A's and rarely gets in trouble. What would her label be? *coughs* oreo *coughs again*. (I can say that because for several years that's what I was called). But I digress. The man with his pants sagging is labeled a "Thug" and the mom who drives a mini van is labeled a homemaker. Our society thrives off of being able to put every single thing into a category. But for women, titles mean more than any Goodwill sale Macys has ever put on. Here's an example:

I dated (I should use that term more loosely, but for now, deal) for 7 years off and on. For awhile it was all fun and games, but as time went on, I kept wondering, why am I getting treated like a girlfriend, but my relationship status on Facebook still says Single as hell?! We eventually ended up going our separate ways for a final time. A few months back, we ran into each other and caught up. Of course at first came the polite, you look good, so do you, whats new conversations. But later after a few drinks (we were at a bar) I finally came out and told him about my issues with him. In a drunken tearful vent, I asked "Why was it never me? It was always so and so, but never me" to which he replied " If it helps, it was always you, just without the title". So there it was.

In another isolated incident, a friend of mine (knowing that I'm involved) asked why I had not yet changed my relationship status on Facebook. Apparently, "it's complicated" is too simplistic for people. *shrugs*. Do we as females only settle for the feelings and leave the title by the wayside? And is the title even that important? The answer is......... It depends on the person. For me, there was a moment in time where titles didn't matter. But as I got older and started to appreciate my own self worth, I realized that I deserved both the feelings and the label. But please do not take my "self worth" statement as saying that anybody with self worth would want a title. It just depends on what you value in your life, and a silly (or not so silly) title may not be that high on your priority list.

So how does one go about procuring both the feelings and the title? Well, that answer isn't so easy. You have to find someone that is willing to shout from the rooftops that they are in fact taken with you, and by you. And as many gal fabs know, that is a challenge in itself. But, we like challenges don't we ladies? #MESSAGE *sigh* :)