The Good Fight

The dictionary defines fighting as “taking part in a violent
struggle involving the exchange of physical blows or the use of weapons” . It
is also described as the act of engaging in war.

When you first hear the word fight, what’s the first image that pops into your head? Unfortunately, thanks to today’s society, when I hear or read the word fight I think about Love and Hip Hop and Chrissy beating that unfortunate girl out of her yaky ponytail. But what does fighting mean in a relationship? I’m not talking about heavy weight boxing matches between two
lovers, or a yelling match that can be heard a mile away. I’m talking about
what happens, when 1 party stops putting up a fight?

Usually when women sense that something is wrong they use war
tactics to find out intelligence secrets of the opposing side. I hate to bring
up Love and Hip Hop again, but in last week’s episode, we saw that Chrissy threatend
Jim with a breakup if he didn’t propose. While in Miami, she told her friends how hurt
she was that Jim seemed completely unfazed by her claims. She felt like he didn’t
even fight for her. They say actions speak louder than words. You can say you’re
leaving or you will or won’t do something until your blue in the face. But when
those words are followed by actions that are how you know where you stand. Now
some men might take this as playing games, but honestly it’s a very cleaver
(but risky) way of finding out what’s really good.

Take myself for example. After a few years of giving up the
milk for free, I finally decided to let farmer john know it wasn’t going down
like that anymore. The response I got was nothing short of a should shrug, a
pat on the back, and a bid for a good day. Imagine how stupid I felt to know
that what I felt, and what he was feeling where on 2 totally separate planes.
There was absolutely NO fight in him. After a couple of minutes of feeling
stunned and a little hurt. I picked my pride back up and realized that his
reaction was the best thing that’s happened to me in a long time. Why? Because now
I know where we stood. That’s why I said the actions followed by the words were
risky. If you aren’t willing to accept that you may not be worth the fight then
by all means stay in your bubble of ignorance.

Don't take that last statement as judgment because it’s not.
I don’t really believe in New Year’s resolutions, because you should strive for
better every day of your life. But if you’re going to resolve to do anything,
fight for forward progression. Anybody who is content with mediocrity and
doing, and saying the same thing day in and day out with no progression, doesn’t
deserve your fight. If it’s worth it, put up your dukes. But it takes 2 people
to fight, and if you’re the only 1 putting in the effort, then the battle has
already been lost.